it was discovered late last night that some of the US public are not spending 100% of their paychecks on gasoline.
"This is a shocking development," said a Sheik of Arabia. "It has came to me in a dream that we need to increase prices and get that last dollar from the infidels who saved us from being destroyed by fellow Muslim Saddam Hussein.."
There is no word from the Bush administration on the possibility that Air Force 1 will be traded for a Piper Cub and 15 gallons of high test.
In other news, Demo leaders will meet today on increasing the fuel tax by another $3.00 per gallon.
"We must save the lovable polar bear," Ms Pelosi said when asked if she had considered the plight of the common US citizens. "Global Warming is real and must be defeated! Driving cars is our enemy and will be taxed out of existence!"
The stock maraket did not open this morning due to it falling below zero Friday.
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