Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Q and A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV
set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending
your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,
Honduras and Guatemala .
* If you buy a car, it will go to Japan .
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to
management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead, keep the money in America by:
1 spending it at yard sales, or
2 going to ball games, or
3 spending it on prostitutes, or
4 beer or
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the US .)
I'm going to go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that I met at a
yard sale and we're going to drink beer all day!
Hat tip to Dave T
As Bill Katz points out in Urgent Agenda the bloom is comming off the rose to a small degree among members of the Obama Lovers of The Left. From Richard Cohen we have these words.
Barack Obama's trip to Copenhagen to pitch Chicago for the Olympics would have been a dumb move whatever the outcome.......The first, and to my mind most important, is whether Obama knows who he is.
This business of self-knowledge is no minor issue. It bears greatly on the single most crucial issue facing this young and untested president: Afghanistan. Already, we have his choice for Afghanistan commander, Gen. Stanley A. McChrystal, taking the measure of his commander in chief and publicly telling him what to do. This MacArthuresque star turn called for a Trumanesque response, but Obama offered nothing of the kind. Instead, he used McChrystal as a prop, adding a bit of four-star gravitas to that silly trip to Copenhagen by having the general meet with him there.
This is the president we now have: He inspires lots of affection but not a lot of awe.
Why do I keep reading this? Why do so many on the Left and the Right keeping saying it? What has he done to inspire affection?
What has he done to rate anything but rank dismissal as an empty suit who demands unequal treatment?
Do they mean because he is a self-identified black man?
Isn't this the same racism that assumed that black children couldn't learn at the same level as white children and lowered the level in our K-12 schools? That, of course, was pure nonsense but it led to the destruction of the public schools.
Of course if you believe that blacks can perform as well as whites or yellows or reds then you have to also understand that they can be just as wrong and just as ignorant.
It is called equal treatment, Too bad too many of us don't practice it.