Lists Redux

"About 10 – 12 years ago I was on an airplane going someplace. The book I had with me was bad so I started playing mind “games.” In this case it was trying to remember every hotel/motel that I had ever stayed in. After awhile I took out my trusty portable and made a spreadsheet.

I have kept it up pretty well up to date and this morning I opened it up to add the trip to Pensacola. Now you may think it silly, and I couldn't’t argue with you, but I find scanning the hotels and cities, some with brief notes, great for bringing back memories. As I looked, I noted that there were 707 discrete line entries. Not number of “stays.” Not number of “nights.” Discrete line entries. Given that I had a tendency to stay at the same hotel time and again, and that many were multiple night stays….."

I thought of this last night when I was looking for a Marriott to stay near the OFCNFOEC next month. As I scanned my account I noticed this small message...

It’s been our privilege to serve you for 500 nights.

That's slightly over one and one third years. Figuring a maximum of 4 stays per week, that's 125 weeks which is two years, 5 months and one week. But who's counting?? No wonder I try to turn into every Marriott entrance I drive by.... My subconscious thinks I'm home... But I digress...

What brought all of this back was I couldn't find my reading glasses this morning. I mean those newspapers, in an attempt to save paper, have made the print at least 50% smaller...As I fumbled around I rechecked my shirt pocket and discovered they had magically appeared... Matter transport is a trait of reading glasses that is not well known outside of a select group of citizens...

The last time I observed the disappearance of vision aids was at a Marriott in the US. After a hard days work a bud and I enjoyed a nice dinner at a local bistro and finished off the night at the hotel bar....

When it came time to unpack..... never, never, never unpack in advance. It removes the element of adventure and surprise... Anyway, as he later explained, he discovered that he didn't have the soaking/cleaning solution for his hard contacts... So he just dumped them in a glass put in a little water and laid his weary head upon his pillows..

About three o'clock he woke up suffering from the result of several drinks, and even more wine... which yielded an intense thirst.. He made it to the bathroom, saw the glass... didn't notice the water... added water... drank water and swallowed contact lens. Since he had no back ups and was basically blind, getting him through the airport and home was something to remember...

I ragged him for years, but never told anyone else. He's gone now and I will never reveal his name.

After all, what happens on the road, stays on the road.