Monday, January 5, 2009

Insults

You can blame Larry P for these.


These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my
husband I'd give you poison."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the
gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or
your mistress."

"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -
Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
pleasure." Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the
dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading
it." - Moses Hadas

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved
of it." - Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." - Oscar
Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a
friend.... if you have one." -
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is
one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -
Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -
Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -
Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -
Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.." - Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on
it?" - Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -
Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support
rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho
Marx

Pelosi changes the rules


House Speaker Nancy Pelosi plans to re-write House rules today to ensure that the Republican minority is unable to have any influence on legislation. Pelosi’s proposals are so draconian, and will so polarize the Capitol, that any thought President-elect Obama has of bipartisan cooperation will be rendered impossible before he even takes office.

Pelosi’s rule changes -- which may be voted on today -- will reverse the fairness rules that were written around Newt Gingrich’s “Contract with America.”


Link

Uh, hate to tell you this but do you understand that Pelosi works for Hussein?

Uh, hate to yell you thus but do you understand that Pelosi works for Hussein?

Uh, hate to tell you this but do you understand that Pelosi works for Hussein?

Do you have the point?

Husssein will cluck and shrug while his thugs do the dirty work. That's politics Chicago style, dear chums. And you aint seen nuttin yet!