A bit of humor

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement -- not even her parent's nasty divorce.

Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother- of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had bought the exact same dress! Jennifer asked her to exchange it, but she refused. 'Absolutely not, I look like a million bucks in this dress and I'm wearing it,' she replied.

Jennifer told her mother who graciously said, 'Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day.' A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, 'Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it. Her mother just smiled and replied, 'Of course I do, dear.

I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding.'

NOW I ASK YOU - IS THERE A WOMAN OUT THERE, ANYWHERE, WHO WOULDN'T ENJOY THIS STORY? SEND IT TO EVERY WOMAN YOU KNOW!!!

(HTBAPB - HOW TO BE A PERFECT BITCH!!)

Barry H blows off the troops... again

Got this from Larry P who is well plugged in.

Here’s an e-mail from one of the soldiers Obama visited.

As you know I am not a very political person. I just wanted to pass along that Senator Obama came to Bagram Afghanistan for about an hour on his visit to “The War Zone”. I wanted to share with you what happened.

He got off the plane and got into a bullet proof vehicle, got to the area to meet with the Major General (2 Star) who is the commander here at Bagram.

As the Soldiers where lined up to shake his hand he blew them off and didn’t say a word as he went into the conference room to meet the General. As he finished, the vehicles took him to the ClamShell (pretty much a big top tent that military personnel can play basketball or work out in with weights) so he could take his publicity pictures playing basketball. He again shunned the opportunity to talk to Soldiers to thank them for their service.

So really he was just here to make a showing for the American’s back home that he is their candidate for President. I think that if you are going to make an effort to come all the way over here you would thank those that are providing the freedom that they are providing for you.

I swear we got more thanks from the NBA Basketball Players or the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders than from one of the Senators, who wants to be the President of the United States. I just don’t understand how anyone would want him to be our Commander-and-Chief. It was almost that he was scared to be around those that provide the freedom for him and our great country.

If this is blunt and to the point I am sorry, but I wanted you all to know what kind of caliber of person he really is. What you see in the news is all fake.

Bartry H is anointed

You can'ty miss this. You just can't.

The law.

There are many well known laws that apply to the real world that we live in. I think this is one of the largest and best collections known. Should you have some that are not included, please forward. Some examples:

Cornuelle's Law - Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.

Anthony's Law of the Workshop
Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible
corner of the workshop

Barber's Laws of Backpacking
3) The weight of your pack increases in direct proportion
to the amount of food you consume from it. If you
run out of food, the pack weight goes on increasing anyway.

The above also applies to dirty clothes. Any amount of clothes carried with you on a trip increases in weight by 10% per day in direct proportion to the nearest of the return date.

Boren's Laws
1) When in doubt, mumble.
2) When in trouble, delegate.
3) When in charge, ponder.

And my favorite:

Bilbo's Proverb
Never laugh at live dragons.

What Barry H really thinks...

"The senator decided out of respect for these servicemen and women that it would be inappropriate to make a stop to visit troops at a U.S. military facility as part of a trip funded by the campaign.”

Here's the rest of the story.

Staff member: "We've got you scheduled at 3 o'clock to visit the hospital..."

Barry B: "Wow Dude, we gonna shoot some hoops???? Little B ball....?"

Staff member: "Uh... these guys have been wounded....?

Barry B: "No round balls? I can't display my awesome abilities?"

Staff member: "Uh..... Not really... missing arms, legs...."

Barry B: "No photo ops???"

Staff member: "No."

Barry B: "Get me outta here."

Link

It is hard to believe that there are

this many stupid people in the world.

Has Barack Obama's trip abroad changed your opinion of him?
Yes, for the better 44%
No 36%
Yes, for the worse 20%
Total Votes: 68,682


Who would do a better job as president on foreign policy?
Barack Obama 52%
John McCain 41%
Neither 7%

Total Votes: 69,342

"The walls between the countries with the most and those with the least cannot stand. The walls between races and tribes, natives and immigrants, Christian and Muslim and Jew cannot stand," he said

Plainer: I gonna give you all America's money and don't you be worrying about needing those Visa and Passport things. You just get over there as soon as you can. We got 7 new states for you and I need your vote in 2016.

And if someone mentions Hussein and JFK to me again I shall hit them. Yes I will.




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Let all the votes count

Rep. Roy Blunt, the House Republican whip, on July 8 introduced a resolution demanding that the Defense Department better enable U.S. military personnel overseas to vote in the November elections. That act was followed by silence. Democrats normally leap on an opportunity to find fault with the Bush Pentagon. But not a single Democrat joined Blunt as a co-sponsor, and an all-Republican proposal cannot pass in the Democratic-controlled House.

Don't forget! Lefties support our troops!

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